I Cry Today

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I divide my life into two distinct categories-my memories prior to 9/11 and life that existed after 9/11. I could not watch today without reliving the emotions of that day as I have every year since. As it is difficult to believe 15 years have passed it is even harder to believe there are college kids who only know of this day through the images that replay and the stories they’ve heard.

Life moves quickly. But for me time seems to stand still when I watch the images from that day. As if my emotions have been stored forever in a capsule that is opened each time I watch the events unfold. They are fresh just as they were that day. The pain is still real. The fear is still there. The overwhelming sadness still robs my soul of compassion.

I want to tell those jumpers that everything will be okay. But I know that is a lie. I’ll try to imagine the desperation they must have felt. The burning pain that must have existed to convince them the only solution was to jump. I want to catch them and hold them. But I cannot.

I cry today as I did 15 years ago.

I still battle the demons inside that wish death of those who perpetrated the attacks. I want them and everyone like them to suffer. But I also know this is not going to bring those who died back to life. So I cry this morning watching the replay as I have every single year since that day. I’ll think about how life is different now compared to then. I’ll thank God above for my wife and family. And then on Monday morning I will go to work and my life will start up once again. I guess that is how it is supposed to go. I guess this is how it is supposed to be.

I Have Been Fortunate…Or Have I?

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I have been fortunate in my life.  I was raised by great parents (hi mom!) who instilled in me to work hard, dream big and expect to be happy.  I have always had great jobs working for industry titans which have provided a lot of stability in my life.  I have traveled to some great countries and spent a short period traveling around a good part of the United States.  Now, I have a loving wife and the most beautiful little puppy in the world, Sir Bentley McStinkerson.  Evelina has designed and decorated our home to look like an In Style magazine photo shoot which is nice to come home to after a long day at the paper.

I have been fortunate…or have I?  Do any of these things happen by chance or is there a god who has shown more favor on me than others?  I guess it is possible, but I have also worked hard in my life and committed myself.  To say I have been fortunate has the undertone as if to say I have been lucky; like the roll of the dice.  In that sense I give an emphatic NO!  I am where I am, doing what I am doing because of hard work, a strong character and a little fortune.  I do not believe I am doing anything special in life except believing in myself and trying to add value to the world around me.

So, back to my original statement-I have been fortunate in my life.  All anyone has to do to experience fortune is take years of dedication, skill, hard work and add in opportunity…that is the recipe for fortune.

Sometimes Your Best Isn’t Going to Be Enough

I have an opinion about life and success with which I know a lot of people disagree.  I know this because every time I have stated my opinion I get countless emails telling me how wrong I am.  

There are many levels to success-losing weight, making more money, being a better parent, becoming more organized, etc.  My opinion is that those who do not succeed simply do not try hard enough.  I can hear the roars now, but stop for a moment and think about your failures or shortcomings.  Those things you truly desired you worked hard and reached your goal.  Those things you didn’t achieve you had waning desire and did not work as hard.  I have experienced it and so have you.  

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So when I get emails from readers asking why they haven’t been able to achieve a certain goal I always ask them about their effort level.  And this is the time when people get defensive when they should really be focusing on introspection.  I’ll give you an example.  

Several months ago I posted that I would be closing my furniture business and beginning the search for a new career path.  And that process was frustrating as the good jobs seemed to be far and few between.  One day I was lamenting to Evelina and she questioned my effort level. To her it didn’t seem as though I was committing myself 100%, yet I was complaining about the difficulty in finding a new job.  Of course I was immediately defensive, but after I had spent some time thinking about what she had said I realized she was correct.  The following week I decided to commit 8 hours every day to finding a new career and to send out 10 resumes every day until I found employment.  Soon I was contacted by the newspaper and after a few interviews I had found my new work family.  

I did not like listening to the harshness of her words, but my wife was correct.  I had spent a couple of months half-assing my job search and my results reflected my efforts. Once I was honest with myself and upped my efforts my results changed completely.  In past posts I have used the phrase “change your mind, change your life” and this is exactly what happened to me.  

So any time someone says to  me “I have been trying to lose weight, but I just can’t seem to remain committed” the first thing I think of is desire and effort.  There are many things one can do to stay committed like joining a support group, Weight Watchers or sessions with a counselor.  If someone wants to make more money or get a better job they can take night classes to further their education and become more qualified.  Sometimes your best isn’t going to be enough and you need to learn to invest in the help of an expert(s).  This is where many people fail because they get to the end of their knowledge and when that isn’t enough, they quit.  You have to push through.  Those who want to achieve will utilize every and all resources to get what they want.  If you need to lose weight and you can’t seem to get over the hump, then go speak with a counselor and get it sorted.  If you want that job, but can’t beat out the competition, then go take night classes and get some additional education.  I can hear a few of you saying these words are easy to say but not easy to do. The truth is it’s not easy and that’s why many of you fail and quit.  

Ultimately you can do anything you want to do.  The factors involved will be desire and effort.  You have to find the thing(s) you really want and then work your tail off to get those things.  But sitting around and paying lip service does nothing and at some point you are going to have to exhaust every possible resource to get what you want and if you don’t it falls directly on you and no one else.  For many this personal responsibility is hard to accept, but it does not change the truth in this principle.   The difficulty for me is I cannot implant desire into other people and I cannot convince others of this truth. Personal responsibility is one of those things that each person must learn for themselves.    

Those who get results simply out work and out desire everyone else-period.  

It would be easy for me to use MS as my reason for not doing a lot of things and not one person would challenge me.  I could sit around every day, claim a disability check and ride out the rest of my life.  But I don’t want that life. So I choose to work hard toward specific goals I have set for myself.  I choose hard work over pain.  I choose achieving my goals over making excuses.  My body hurts every day I get home.  I am overtaken some days with exhaustion.  

The pain becomes a heavy burden, but I would rather deal with the pain that comes from taking action than become a person who allows excuses to rob me of achieving. Eventually you have to try harder.    

 

How To Understand the True Struggle In Life

Life is not easy and anyone who tells you otherwise is lying or has never put forth much effort.  

It is my belief that the real struggle in life isn’t against getting ahead or finding success. Our struggle isn’t against the system or against other people.  Our struggle isn’t even against ourselves.  Humanity’s struggle is one against desire; we want more-more money, more recognition, more love, more friends, more promotions, more stuff.  

More, more, more.  If it exists, then we want it.  

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Desire is the root cause of all evil

The Buddha

Some would argue that this quote is better translated as “craving is the root of all suffering” which says what I believe to be the essence of the statement.  The undisciplined mind will focus on that which it does not possess and will crave those things leaving us wanting.  And it is this disconnect and discontent that creates in us feelings of inadequacy. Buddha realized this and warned us to put off craving for material possessions.

I believe Jesus had a similar belief in the struggle against desire and human nature.

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Image depicting what Jesus would most likely have looked like based on anthropological data.  Stark contrast to the European blond hair, blue eyed depiction.

If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven.

Jesus of Nazareth

Whereas Buddha was referencing more the struggle here on Earth, Jesus was taking the concept one step further when he begins to speak of the spiritual nature of life. Nonetheless, there is still a clear statement that perfection or contentment comes when human beings realize that separation from the desire to possess is necessary.

Do you realize this essential principle?  Do you understand that 100% of your struggles relate to your desire to possess things which you don’t currently have?   Do you recognize this truth and are you willing to separate from craving in order to become content with the person you are right now?  Are you willing to accept yourself with all of your flaws and deficiencies?

It is my belief that until each person comes to terms with desire and craving that he/she will never be truly content.  

Desire will always be man’s downfall.  

How To Network Your Blog-10/1/16

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Here’s how to network your blog. The work is done for you, all you have to do is LIKE, COMMENT and FOLLOW others.  The more you network with other blogs, the more other blogs will network with you!

(click How to Network Your Blog to view yesterday’s post)

Radiate Positivity

Homemakers United

Yadadarcyyada

Mystical Writer

Maze of the Mind

The Recipe Hunter

The Utopia Universe

Notes From the UK

Die Erste Eslarner Zeitung (The First Newspaper Eslarner)  Note: Enable your translator if you don’t read German.

Sparkle With UC

 

 

 

 

Meet and Greet: 10/1/16

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It’s the Meet and Greet weekend everyone!!    

Ok so here are the rules:

  1. Leave a link to your page or post in the comments of this post.
  2. Reblog this post.  It helps you, it helps me, it helps everyone!
  3. Edit your reblog post and add tags.
  4. Feel free to leave your link multiple times!  It is okay to update your link for more exposure every day if you want.  It is up to you!

  5. Share this post on social media.  Many of my non-blogger friends love that I put the Meet n Greet on Facebook and Twitter because they find new blogs to follow.

See ya on Monday!!

Only 1 Partner Spot Available!

I have 1 spot remaining in the Partner program.  I will take inquiries in the order they are received so be sure to act quickly.  These spots tend to go fast so CONTACT ME now.

 

This opportunity is perfect for the blogger looking to gain extra exposure for their page, book, brand, etc.   We all need a little help every now and again.  If you need a little help, then take a few moments and contact me for details.  Growing your readership is not easy, but what if you had a boost?!

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My current Partners are: Victoria Dillard Daily, The Wandering BroskiTales From the Cabbage PatchAnn Cavitt FisherMoore To Say, Blog of a Mad Black WomanHunt’s Clubhouse, Lucky Otter’s HavenRevealed8A Kinder WayAria-Bella Rises, Cyranny’s CoveOne More Shot Please, Life of a Busy DadAdvocate for Mental IllnessSingle Girls RockPeace From PanicGetting Fit for FortyTwo Are Better Than OneSecond Wind Leisure PerspectivesMellix Life, , In the Arena, In Between ModerationBeing LydiaTom SlatinHarsh Reality, Rendezvous En New York, Susie Lindau’s Wild Ride and Insane Roots.

If you are interested in becoming my Partner, then contact me for more details.  I hope you are having a great week!!

How You Can Be a Better Dad Series – 17

Is it important to you to teach your kids the importance of being debt-free?

Life of a Busy Dad

This is number 17 of 25 posts in this series.  I hope you are learning new things with this series.  Feel free to check out the rest of them by clicking here.  The following advice will only work if you put the time and effort into making them work.  I hope you are getting positive results by doing what I have listed already.

If this is things that you are already doing then just consider this as a refresher course as being a Dad.  But please still read the article. You might learn something new or even can add more in the comment section if you have a better way to explain it.

Moms can do these as well as Dads so don’t be afraid to try Moms.

Advice “Once in a while, take a day off just because, and spend it with your family”

This is a perfect way…

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The Ryder Cup Chiari Warrior

Interesting info on In the Arena. I knew he had brain surgery a few years back but had no idea why.

In the Arena

J.B. Holmes PGA golfer is representing the U.S.A. In the Ryder Cup. Holmes had brain surgery for Chiari and has been a wonderful advocate for all of us waging war against Chiari Malformation.

Go J.B. And USA!!

Ryder Cup Chiarian

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always dream big orlando espinosaIf you want me to share one of your posts with my readers please click the link below and add your link to the comments.

 

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About Terri-Home Page

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My name is Terri Webster Schrandt and I blog about the fun things in life from my perspective. I take leisure very seriously because it involves one-third of our lives…really!

I am lucky to have an active lifestyle that involves…

Source: Second Wind Leisure Perspectives

Cold Little Socks

The adventure continues on Mellix Life!!

Mellix Life

Never assume things in the Mellix home are in the correct place. It is safer to begin with where did I last see them.

After working more on my closet organization (still not done but it’s going well) I walk into the kitchen for a drink. Upon opening the refrigerator I find a pair of Aaron’s red and grey striped socks on the bottom shelf. Interesting…

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I question my boys about the socks and surprisingly the sock owner was not the culprit!

Isaiah’s explanation:

“Aaron and I were playing a game. We were taking turns trying to shut each other in the refrigerator. I was getting cold so I stole Aaron’s socks. I forgot to take them with me when I got out.”

Well…okay then. Not shocking at all. Just another evening with the Mellix boys.

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Only 1 Partner Spot Left: Don’t Delay!

I now only have 1 spot available in the Partner program.  I will take inquiries in the order they are received so be sure to act quickly.  These spots tend to go fast so CONTACT ME now.   

 

My current Partners are: Victoria Dillard DailyTales From the Cabbage PatchAnn Cavitt FisherMoore To Say, Blog of a Mad Black Woman, Hunt’s Clubhouse, Lucky Otter’s HavenRevealed8A Kinder WayAria-Bella Rises, Cyranny’s CoveOne More Shot Please, Life of a Busy DadAdvocate for Mental IllnessSingle Girls RockPeace From PanicGetting Fit for FortyTwo Are Better Than OneSecond Wind Leisure PerspectivesMellix Life, , In the Arena, In Between ModerationBeing LydiaTom SlatinHarsh Reality, Rendezvous En New York, Susie Lindau’s Wild Ride and Insane Roots.

Yes-sign-me-up-orange1This opportunity is perfect for the blogger looking to gain extra exposure for their page, book, brand, etc.   We all need a little help every now and again.  If you need a little help, then take a few moments and contact me for details.  Growing your readership is not easy, but what if you had a boost?!

If you are interested in becoming my Partner, then contact me for more details.  I hope you are having a great week!!