I have written in the past about friends and relationships and how we must carefully consider those we allow in our circle. Too often we allow people to creep into our inner-circle that have no business participating in our lives! When this happens we end up using valuable energy dealing with these individuals.
Be aware to surround yourself with people that are generous, kind, loving and supportive. This way the majority of your energy can go to building a positive and productive life.
I have listed 11 types of people that you should avoid like the plague:
- The Leverager. There are few things that will kill you inside more than a person that is constantly reminding you of how you have let them down so as to get you to do something for them. This person is constantly documenting other’s mistakes in order to use those mistakes for leverage.
- Mr. Impossible to Please.
These people are the worst restaurant dates. Because they cannot be pleased, they complain about everything! Their taste for imperfection is insatiable which leads to loads of negativity and incessant complaining. And it is only a matter of time before their complaining and negativity gets directed at you and your life! Their general negativity quickly becomes a drag to be around.
- The Dream Dumper.
This is the person that is so unhappy with the results of their own life that they want to convince you that you are not capable either. Misery needs company and they can’t have you achieving success because they might be left alone. Therefore, their mission is to keep you anchored down right beside them.
- The Manipulator. This is the most venomous of traits. Manipulators are constantly directing the traffic, usually stirring up controversy. Manipulators don’t live life, they plan it! And their planning involves using their negativity to intimidate you to direct your thoughts and actions. ELIMINATE THESE PEOPLE FROM YOUR LIFE IMMEDIATELY!!! You will always lose with a manipulator in your life.
- The Drama queen.
These friends always have some problem cooking in the pot. They always seem to have someone causing them strife, accepting no responsibility for their contribution to the drama. Problems are always someone else’s fault. They are incapable to see that they are the common denominator. And if there is no natural drama going on they will stir some up!
- The Selfish. Most of you are aware of my belief that volunteering is the way to fulfillment. Selfish people are only interested in activities that benefit themselves. Why should they be bothered to do something for another human being? It’s a dog-eat-dog world and they are only willing to focus on numero uno.
- The Controller. This person is always looking for ways to keep you right where they want you; under their thumb. They must know where you are, what you are doing and who’s company you are keeping. The controller by nature plants seeds of distrust due to their high levels of insecurity. Run!
- Mrs. Arrogant. The arrogant person downplays the achievements, possessions and qualities of others in order to protect their limited worldview and lack of experience. The arrogant person acts and reacts from a place of deep insecurity and will act out aggressively when cornered. They must look the best, must be the center of attention and must have the best.
- The Materialistic. Materialism might be the surest sign of a shallow person. This person’s sole focus in life is to wear the latest and most expensive clothes, jewelry, perfume/cologne and loves to show off their stuff! Nothing is too big and nothing costs too much! Their self-worth is anchored in the possessions that they own.
- The Constant Victim. The victim might be the most frustrating person to deal with as they demand lots of your energy and time. Their story is the same over and over: someone or something has screwed them over. They accept no responsibility in the events of their life, always casting blame for failure or mishaps on others. They will bleed your energy reserves bone dry.
- The Liar. This person can be difficult to identify. The liar has made a life of weaving webs of deceit and rarely speaks the straight truth. They can lie about the simplest things, even when the truth would benefit them more. The problem with the liar is their character is like Swiss cheese: full of holes. And their low character makes them prone to more serious character offenses.
(I frequent AskDr.Darcy.com as a research tool as she has people write in and she answers the reader; kind of a modern version of Dear Abby only with a Masters degree and PhD!! Anyway, click the link and see what she has to say about toxic friends and the way they drain your life-energy.)
These are just a few of the types of people that I have had personal experience with that I eventually eliminated from my life. In the end we must have positive, successfully-minded people in our inner-circle. If not you will waste time and energy dealing with the shenanigans of people that do not have your best interest in mind.
If you practice speaking less and listening more you will be able to more easily identify these types of people. And as Maya Angelou said: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them; the first time.”
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