Throughout the week I am challenged with producing quality original content for the Dream Big community to read and digest. I try to post 3-4 original posts each week focusing on observations of the world around me, especially as it relates to setting and achieving goals, daring to chase dreams and learning to expect more of oneself.
Some weeks this task can be very difficult, leaving me with posts that feel manufactured and contrived. Other weeks ideas flow with ease which leaves me feeling proud of my work and eager for you to read my latest thoughts. I have responded to hundreds of comments, emails and private messages over the last week ranging from words of gratitude, general comments and questions/advice about posted topics. And one conversation continues to emerge over and over: self-belief.
I do not want to dive deep into what causes self-doubt, nor do I want to directly discuss how to improve your confidence. I want to talk about why you should have self-confidence.
Here’s the deal: many people lose their confidence because they lose their true self. Life has a way of straining out originality and producing a very large segment of conformists. I have written about this idea in the past: graduate school, get job, get married, get promoted, buy house, have children, raise children, pay for children’s education, retire, die. In a nut shell that is life for the majority of individuals. We allow ourselves to be turned into a person that looks, talks and acts like every other person around us.
What we forget is that there is not another human being on the planet like ourselves!
You are a unique individual, a one-off, an original.
There is not another person on Earth that sees the world the way you see it, that feels the way you feel, that thinks the way you think. You are designed to be different in every single detail, so why would you not be confident? There’s no one else with which to compare yourself!! Your self-confidence will be as high as you allow it to be. And the more you discover your unique, individual self the higher your confidence will grow.
The more you compare yourself to others and their accomplishments the more your true self-confidence will dwindle.
Think about life as a company. Successful businesses are so because different people specialize in different jobs. Each job requires a very particular skill set and produces something necessary for the department to survive. When combined, the skills from each individual produces an overall company product which then can be sold for profit. There are many different jobs needed for a company to succeed: HR, accounting, sales, administrative, sales support, manufacturing, etc. If the entire company was composed of only sales staff, then who would make the product for the sales staff to sell? Each person contributes a unique skill set to allow the company to survive.
And so it is with you. In order for the world to be ultra-successful each individual must contribute to life according to his or her unique abilities and talents. Determine what YOU are all about, not what others want or expect you to be. Some people spend their entire lives in sales when they really should be in design and product development. The more you see yourself as a truly unique, special INDIVIDUAL, the more your confidence will grow.
You were designed to provide this world with your gifts and talents. That is what makes the world successful!
Stop trying to live up to what others expect of you and start living up to what you should expect of yourself.
Celebrate your individuality. Rediscover your true self and you will find your confidence.
Agreed! Great advice!
I appreciate you taking time to visit my page and read!
Great piece!
Thank you much for taking a few moments to read!
Amen absolutely!
Such an essential truth that many of us forget and then have to rediscover later in life. Great post!
I am grateful that you enjoyed my post. I also appreciate you visiting my page!!
I love this! You might enjoy a fellow blogger, Taking the Mask Off (sorry, can’t link right now)… he is taking a break from writing on WordPress currently, but there are a lot of past posts to sift through =)
I follow his page. His theme is mental illness, correct?
Yes, not really just mental illness, but becoming awake mentally, and realizing your full potential without social masks or stigmas.
Yes I have read his page several times. He is a good read!
I really needed to read this today. Thank you for this.
On occasion we all need a kind word or reminder. I am glad I could be both today for you! Life is about helping others
It took me a long time to come to that conclusion- of being uniquely me and proud of it. When I finally honored my true self I couldn’t help but be confident. Although, it didn’t happen over night and I still have my off days for sure!
I think to some degree we all have played a role other than our true self. When I started being true to myself my quality of life increased drastically!
Mine too:-) But I think a lot of it was just the shift in perception because nothing outwardly drastically changed. Just more of an inner peace, which is better than anything you can get externally for sure!
Recognizing ourselves as individual, forgetting about fulfilling expectations, and living our own lives are things that requiere plenty of courage to do. I sincerely admire the people that are brave enough to break free of the molds and live as they see fit. That’s my definition of an awesome person.
I agree completely!
Recently, I have this inner pull to stay at home with my kids for a while while giving my time to developing my career in writing and Childcare. Meanwhile, my family (out of concern) think getting a paid job will be best for me.
I am most confident when I am writing or doing things that I am passionate about which is volunteering at orphanages. I really so want to tow this line.
Thanks for another great post.