Reasons Why You Should Be Careful of the Words You Speak

Reasons Why You Should Be Careful of the Words You Speak

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Have you ever given thought to the power your words have over your life?

A couple days ago I was on a sales call with a coworker to talk with a veterinarian about doing business with the newspaper.  She was there to speak about the benefits of print media and I was there to discuss how we could help them improve their online presence.

On the way back to the office we had a great conversation about the principle that people become the words they speak and the power of the mind.   In the past year she has lost significant weight which led me to ask her what brought about her wanting to change.  Her explanation was simple-she changed her mind.  She expressed to me how her physical body had come to represent how she perceived the world around her and how she perceived herself…mentally.  She went on to explain how years of negative talk had developed into negative habits which led down the slippery slope of gaining weight.  And I found this explanation to be insightful.

She believed she had become the words that she spoke and outlined how she developed a specific plan to change the words she used, the foods she ate and the ways she thought.  If you have followed my page for any length of time you know this type of conversation is right up my alley!   She eliminated using the word “hate” especially.

We talked about the power of the mind and how people use negative words without truly thinking about the power those words have over their lives.  Using powerful, self-motivating, positive words have the ability to aim one more toward a positive and successful life.  While using negative words and negative mental images have a powerful ability to bend one’s mind into believing and perceiving life to be overwhelming, tough and too difficult to succeed.

Diane Setterfield expressed the power of words in her 2006 novel The Thirteenth Tale:

There is something about words. In expert hands, manipulated deftly, they take you prisoner. Wind themselves around your limbs like spider silk, and when you are so enthralled you cannot move, they pierce your skin, enter your blood, numb your thoughts. Inside you they work their magic.

“Inside you they work their magic.”  What kind of magic is working inside you?  What words are you allowing to come from your mouth to manifest their reality in your life?

I don’t believe it is by happenstance that the vast majority of wealthy/successful people practice positive speaking.  I also don’t believe it is happenstance that the majority of negative speakers experience limited success, limited joy, limited happiness and limited fulfillment.  Some will disagree, but I have experienced it first-hand so you will never convince me that speaking negativity is more productive than speaking positivity.   Once I changed my speaking and began to focus on using more productive and positive words, my mind began to change.  My world-view began to become more positive.  My life began to change for the better.  Slowly but surely my life did change and I am better off for having put in the effort.  Don’t believe me, then sit down with my wife and let her describe the man I was 5 years ago compared to the man I am today.

Most negative people will defend their negativity-I sure did.  I proudly described myself as a realist.  I thought by being true to my belief that people are genuinely awful in some way made me a martyr.  Or maybe it made me feel more enlightened?  As if my suffering somehow made me superior to those idiots that lived under rainbows.  And I was wrong.

My negative thinking, negative speaking days are mostly behind me now and I am grateful that I put in the effort over the last few years to change.  And my wife is especially thankful.  As I have said in the past, my blogging style has transcended attempting to change people.  All I can do is tell my story and hope someone out in this big world reads something I scribble, identifies with my words and decides to make a positive change. That’s all I can ask for.  It does give me pleasure to read emails each month that express the impact my blog has had on someone’s life.  To think about the impact blogging can have is powerful-and humbling.

My hope is that someone reads this today or tomorrow or maybe years from now after I am long gone and decides to focus on turning their frown upside down.  That would make me smile.  And I like to smile these days.


56 thoughts on “Reasons Why You Should Be Careful of the Words You Speak

  1. Although I believe in your positive thinking speeches/blog posts I can only keep it up so long. Then my physical and mental, especially the mental, butt their noses in and I can’t keep it up. I do believe every word you say, but keeping my mind out of it doesn’t work. I haven’t been able to positive think my Bipolar away and it plays havoc with my thinking. At the moment I have given up again. Full blown negative.

      1. It really does work. Mine just happens to work in cycles. Not very positive right now, and my son just reminded me of my negativity. 🙂

    1. I, too, have bi-polar. Sometimes it’s fairly easy to think positively and other days it feels downright impossible. My friend, may I call you that, I will say a prayer for you tonight. When I’m in your shoes, I know how hopeless and dark things get. I want you to know that you’re not alone. I’m here for anyone who needs an ear to listen, especially those who go through this like I do. Having a good support system can make a huge difference. Here’s to a brighter tomorrow.

      1. Thank you for your kind words. It always helps to know that others go through the same things we do. I also am here to listen. Have a great weekend.

  2. I believe the same thing. I never used to pay so much attention to the words I spoke, but I was in at business leadership symposium, and they revealed a statistic that changed the way I do life. They said, according to a study done at Stanford University, 70% of what comes out of people’s mouths is complaining words. I have always thought of myself as a positive person, but I did a quick self-evaluation, and realized that hit too close to home for me. I decided, from then on, to be different, and to speak words of life, even on the hard days. I have since learned this is a very biblical principal as well. “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” (Proverbs 18:21 NIV)

  3. This is beautiful and powerful. Words are powerful! And you know something, Danny? I’ve eliminated the word hate from my vocabulary because of some of your previous posts talking about this. So thank you! 🙂

      1. Thanks, I’m so glad… you’re a positive influence on many people, and your motivation helps others in different ways… all to become better people. 🙂

  4. Given that I live in a modern society where people seem to know everything thanks to the media and their own topsy turvy logic, I’ve decided to observe total silence for at least five years. I will not utter a single word or engage in conversation with anyone except with trees and animals. At least they will not overwhelm and try to impress me with their knowledge.

  5. Well said. While I sometimes seem to be surrounded by indifferent people, I strive to always be kind. You never know what someone’s story is, and what they going through. I live my life as a thoughtful, caring person and only hope I will be treated the same. While that is often not the case, I always strive to be the bigger person. I sleep better at night knowing I have helped others through the volunteer work I do, or just being a good wife, mother and friend. Great post.

  6. Words have an unfathomable amount of power, more than many realize. And it takes longer to put yourself back together after being torn down by cruel words than it did to fall apart in the first place. If we all watched our words and were kinder, this world would be a better place. Though, our actions need to back up those words as well, for as powerful as words are, they become empty and void of all meaning if the actions don’t match up.

  7. There are things we can control and things that we can’t control. I do believe that we can use words to transcend those aspects of life that we can’t control; or we can use words to tear ourselves and everyone around us down. Whether it is a highly paid practitioner of hate speech or the words of self loathing that we silently mutter to ourselves: negativity feeds on itself.

  8. words don’t need to be spoken, either. the thoughts we have about ourselves – the words we apply to ourselves, even silently – can be like loaded weapons of mass destruction. or they can be sunshine and water to thirsty stalks. and all without speaking one of them.

  9. Great post. After reading Charles DuHigg’s book on “Habits” it revealed what Aristotle said so long ago – we are a creature of habits. They can be good or bad ones.

    If we wake up and say it is going to be a great day and do things down that path, we can make it a great day. If we wake up do bad habits to pacifiy ourselves whether it is eating, drinking, smoking, binge watching, etc., we will fulfill that prophesy.

    Words do matter in this process. My efforts to stop drinking were reinforced by an airport conversation I had with a colleague as we awaited our planes. After telling her why I was not drinking, she told me what her husband said to beat his habit. “I am not going to drink today.” I said this every day, until it was no longer needed and I am about to hit my 9th anniversary sans alchohol.

    Again, great story. Thanks, Keith

  10. There is a quote that had misrepresented the power of words: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” I felt that it is injustice to say that words does not affect someone personally. Words are powerful that it could aspire someone or even oneself. There are instances that words alone led to significant changes in the world like the start of World War 2 and the election of the first African-American president in the United States. We need to know that words are significant in our lives and we need to be more cautious in using words to others and ourselves.

  11. I had a terribly difficult week and your post is just what I needed now. I do believe in all you are saying and let me tell you that you are already making a huge difference. I agree, we need a “can do” attitude and positive thinking, positive wording in our lives. Thank you so much for this. It’s what I needed tonight.

    1. I am sorry to hear you have had a tough week. It means a lot to me to know that something I have written has helped you. Thank you for letting me know. 🙂

      1. Your blog is a go to place for inspiration and motivation and the boost I need sometimes to stay positive. You provide me with the “tools” to do it so very often. Even with the questions of the day you manage to trigger thought processes that in the end will lead to solutions. Boom, it’s said… 😉

  12. Most people really don’t consider that a few scribbles put together in a row would carry any energy, but they do. Words have power. That power creates thought and thoughts become things. Words hold magick. Every word we speak is a kind of spell. The outcome of that spell depends on the thought patters they create. You are giving me a blog post idea again!

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