Let Me Ask You A Question – 12/14/16

Let Me Ask You A Question – 12/14/16

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Let me ask you a question:

Have you ever been passed over for a promotion at work?  Or maybe not get something you really wanted, possibly felt you deserved?  How did you respond to the letdown?  

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54 thoughts on “Let Me Ask You A Question – 12/14/16

  1. Hello , Can you please tell me the way to send mail like the way you are sending to me.

    It my humble request to you.

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    On Wed, Dec 14, 2016 at 11:35 PM, Dream Big, Dream Often wrote:

    > dray0308 posted: ” Let me ask you a question: Have you ever been passed > over for a promotion at work? Or maybe not get something you really > wanted, possibly felt you deserved? How did you respond to the letdown? > ” >

  2. Yes I have. I had this manager I didn’t get along with at all. She favored males and would treat females like they were inferior. I’m pretty sure I lost my last job because of her. I couldn’t talk to her with a straight face. I would end up yelling at her because she would talk to me like I was 5. I still cringe at the thought of her. I hope I never see her again. I would probably just act like I didn’t know her. I can’t stand her. To be honest, I’m kind of glad they got rid of me. I was always stressed out there.

      1. Not really. In my line of work, healthcare, therapy specifically, the next place for advancement for me would be to become the coordinator of the department. I got out of the “business mindset” years ago, and changed careers 180 degrees because of it. I found a line of work that fed me, my soul if you will. I’ve never been driven by career advancement or having the corner office. I’m driven by helping, healing, when possible, and serving a purpose, not shareholders. I’ll not get rich, true. I’ll not acquire titles and social position, true. But, I don’t care. My salary is more than I need to live on. I have a title, but it simply allows me to practice as a licensed therapist, nothing more, nothing less. And that’s exactly what I want to do. So, to take a long trip to a short answer, no, I’ve not been passed over.

      2. Well, in general? Of course there’s been times I didn’t get what I wanted. Ya know what though? It sucks, for a time, but then I get over it, put on my big boy pants, then move on.

      3. I ask this because it is easy for me to assume most would take the same action you have mentioned in your comment. The odd thing is I got a lot of emails overnight which shows why we should not assume and why I ask these questions. You would not believe the number of people who told me they took vindictive action against the person they felt “wronged” them. I am also surprised at the number of people who lack the ability to put on their big boy/big girl pants.

      4. Really? Those responses are a bit surprising. Well, actually, now that I think about it, maybe those aren’t surprising at all, frankly. That, in large part, is what’s wrong with the world. Get told no, feel disrespected, retaliate. Rinse and repeat. In my opinion, general-population-wide sense of entitlement is rampant.

        Wait, did I just sound like the get-off-my-lawn guy there? 😃

      5. Lol!!! I find myself sounding like the old grouchy neighbor too. I do agree with all you said so we’ll sit on the porch together yelling at the kids and all of their new fangled gizmos and what not. Lol.

  3. I was an accounting manager at a manufacturer. I had replaced a man who was making $70k more than they were paying me, he did have an MBA though. He was a disaster, and I had to spend a lot of time cleaning up the books because of him. I asked for a raise of $10k. I only got $5k and they asked if we could talk about it again in a few months. I was okay with this, when the few months were up, I asked again, only wanting to be paid what the going rate was for someone in my position. They turned me down. I started looking for another job. The real slap in the face? I stepped back from being the accounting manager, and they hired a man to be the accounting manager and paid him $25k more than they were paying me. I was livid. I had more experience than the new guy, and was better qualified. He was doing a third of what I had been doing, and was a screw up. I asked the owner why this person was making so much more than I was, the answer “he does better reports”. Really, I thought it was because he had a penis. I was the highest paid and most educated woman in the company. Needless to say I’ll never work in manufacturing again.

      1. If that happens in 10 years it will be the greatest accomplishments in our history. Unfortunately, societal changes usually don’t happen that fast. 🙁

  4. Yes. I did get passed over for a promotion and at first I took it really personally. It took a while for me to listen to the reasons. I didn’t have the right degree and they went outside to fill the position. Eventually, the sting left, I stopped taking it personal. Of course the door closes, window opens frame of mind helped too. 😃

    1. I was in a situation at a job in which management made promises of future compensation if I would accept an interim position. Come to find out they used me and after 6 months went outside of our club and hired a GM. I saw the writing on the wall and took another position with another company. It stung for a long time and part of me still resents those who made the promises.

      1. Yeah, I totally get that feeling. Especially when the “qualifications” seem to be fluid depending on who they want for a position. My career was mostly spent in recruiting, and I cant even begin to tell you how much nepotism, and not hiring or promoting qualified candidates that went on. I worked for a large school district and it was astounding who and why people were unfairly passed over.

      2. I have seen application tossed because the applicant’s resume made them “seem pretentious.” What others viewed as pretentious, I viewed as qualified!! lol And how can someone seem pretentious by reading a resume? lol

  5. I kept doing my job as well as possible and made them realize that they have made the wrong decision. And I got the position a couple of months later after they sent the guy packing who had used my work to get the promotion and then wasn’t able to fill the shoes they thought he was wearing… Karma…

  6. My last chance to be promoted I’d worked hard bent over backwards and in the end they gave the position to a graduate with no experience. For two weeks I secretly brewed then I let it go, it obviously wasn’t my turn. She had taken the position two weeks when my boss… the one who passed me over, asked me to mentor her while she was away. Sometimes if you are good at the rubbish they keep you doing it.

  7. I was passed over for promotions multiple times, but then got them eventually. I often reflect on how my career path could have accelerated at a different pace, but I chose not to play politics. I can’t stand politics or the heaping of praise upon superiors that don’t deserve it. I may not have been promoted as quickly as possible, but every promotion I received was earned through hard work and recognition of my talent, not my golf game or a country club membership. I sleep well at night.

      1. I was passed over cause two of us wanted the position and they didn’t want to choose one and not the other for confrontation. For my pay raise I just had to step it up to get it we always got like a 90 day review w like a 0.25 raise.

  8. I developed long-term health problems and was eventually let go from a job i loved.
    It’s very painful. This was several months ago, and i’m still working on making peace with it all.

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