Generations of Hurt

Peace from Panic

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My childhood was wonderful. I grew up with two loving parents, a beautiful home, and a great family life. But there’s a snippet of time that wasn’t so good.

It happened when I was nineteen and my mom was in her late forties. I was a self-absorbed teenager, starting my second year of college.

I noticed Mom was getting thinner, but didn’t think much of it. Until one day when I saw her change her clothes. I’d never seen Mom’s arms and legs look so bony. Her face appeared drawn and gaunt. It scared me. I didn’t say anything to her because I didn’t want to make her feel bad.

I didn’t know why my mom lost so much weight. I can’t pretend to know what she was thinking. Mom told me she felt better not eating much. She didn’t mind being hungry. She said she felt in control.

Mom was a dancer when she was young, and she still took weekly ballet classes. The ballet instructor told Mom she was getting too skinny. Mom laughed it off, thinking that…

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Fresh start

Forty Something Life As We Know It

As a Forty Plusser you just know that not everything in life goes according to plan. Yes sometimes we are forced out of our comfort zone. Actually a lot! Sometimes you need to change direction for the sake of you own survival and sanity!!

Okay, I have depression(bipolar). So there are days that I really don’t see any future at all! Like just wanting to quit…  But then again, I have lots of normal days. It is days like these that I totally embrace. Sometimes life can be a real struggle. But the fact that I am a mother and a wife forces me to find a way to “make it work in life”. This is a conscious decision I make on a daily basis, because to be quite honest…the visit to the psychiatrist only helps that much!! I have to find a constant way deep inside my soul…

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