Why Are So Many Indian Arranged Marriages Successful? The upsides of relinquishing choice, deciding quickly, & lower expectations: Utpal Dholakia Ph.D.(Posted Nov 24, 2015)


While conducting personal research on qualities to look for when choosing a partner, I fell into this article on arranged marriages. I first learned of this practice as a young adult and immediately dismissed it as ridiculous and empathized with women who didn’t have a voice in choosing their partner and were forced into marriage without love being a part of the equation. Thirty years and a different mindset later, I’ve learned that a major disadvantage is lacking knowledge of what love really is, and choosing partners for the wrong reasons based on skewed value systems. Of course, if the family background is one of dysfunction, like mine, it’s possible you still might do a little better in your choices than your parents based on what you saw growing up. I automatically ruled out the absence of a job and a lifestyle that increased the odds of jail time. The…

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My Week 205: The Nothing Box Explained


So I’m still on a ship and the wifi is about what you’d expect, so for now, here’s something I worked up before we left. This blog may contain stereotypes, so sue me—if you can find me…

A couple of weeks ago, I referenced something called the “Nothing Box”. I’m not sure how many people know what that is, so I thought I’d provide some background and context:

Every morning, Ken wakes up super early to take the dog out for a walk. When he’s done, he comes back into the bedroom and immediately falls back to sleep. I’m a tolerant person, but I have my limits, and the other morning I announced, “If you want to keep doing this you’ll be sleeping in another room tonight.” And it was a REASONABLE response because A) I’m on my holidays and B) I have no desire to be awakened at 6:30…

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Duct Tape and Sex!



Three months back I entered a new season by accepting a challenging but exciting position which involves a 30 min commute into Phoenix for training purposes only. Once complete, I’ll perform my job less than 10 min from home and that day of celebration is next week! While thrilled about the new stimulation of my brain cells, I’m most excited about the potential to receive 8 hours of sleep on the regular after experience sleep deprivation the last 6 years. Although I have the capacity to think a thought into oblivion, I’ve created a habit of listening to educational CD’s offered by my phenomenal place of worship, Faith Christian Center. I replay the message continuously until it travels from my head and attaches securely to my heart and only then do I go to the next. Some messages take longer to penetrate the barriers of outdated thinking than others, but…

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Date Nights Should Be Honored and Exciting!


Date Nights Should Be Honored and Exciting!

Evelina and I have begun a practice of having a date night every Wednesday night no matter what; date nights are sacred in our life together.  It is isn’t that date nights are something new for us, but how we are dating.  We have a date night jar and in that jar are a bunch of folded pieces of paper.  A few months ago we sat down together and we came up with new and fun dates; things neither of us had done before.

The idea for the jar was to infuse some new and exciting adventures that we could experience for the first and do so together.

Last night’s date was to go to a studio and paint pottery and it was a blast.  We arrived around 6:15 pm with pizza and a couple of beverages and they took it from there.  The place was so awesome and the staff were informative, kind and patient.  They don’t serve food or drink, but you are more than welcome to bring your own.

Image may contain: Mira Dzierbun, smiling, sitting and indoor

I painted a coffee mug as I love a good cup of coffee in the morning and Evelina painted a piggy bank.  Once the pottery is painted, the studio will glaze and bake them in a kiln and will be ready for us to pick up in a week.

If I am speaking honestly, I thought it was going to be boring, but I was wrong.

Today we will draw out another new date for next Wednesday and this time it will be Evelina’s turn to plan the details.

Off to another new adventure!