Finding a Therapist: What You Need to Know

Leon's Existential Cafe

I’ve decided to write a blog post in the hope of helping people to find a psychotherapist that fits them and what they’re seeking in treatment. The question I get asked most by prospective patients is: how do I know which therapists are good and which aren’t? I, often, encourage patients to ask, and to continue to ask, these types of questions and to afford themselves the chance to explore a potential therapist’s assessment of their ailments, as well as her or his treatment recommendations. Too often, patients have complained that they hadn’t been able to what they were searching for in treatment. Rather than feedback, they received reframing. Instead of collaboration, they had to guess at what their therapist was thinking by means of interpreting head gestures and silence. In writing this post, my intention is to outline several questions prospective patients can ask themselves and their therapists to…

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Becoming One’s Own Mother and Father: The Difficulty of Growing Up

Leon's Existential Cafe

The most challenging aspect of individuation, of growing up, is the groundlessness breadth our feet, the fact that the universe, existence itself, doesn’t give us a blueprint for our lives; it’s our duty, and our burden, to create it for ourselves. And, that is absolutely terrifying! Jean-Paul Sartre called this existential dread: the fear of freedom.

As we get older and separate from our parents, we begin to form our own opinions, our own ideals, and our own core system of values, basing them, in part, off of the knowledge imparted to us by our parents, while founding them in our newly constituted abilities to reason; we decide what’s right and what’s wrong for ourselves, creating the cores of our identities. But, this is when it happens; it’s when self-doubt creeps in. At this juncture, we become aware of the groundlessness; we realize that our parents are no longer there…

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My Daily Observation: 1/4/18


I am rereading The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg for the sixth or seventh time; honestly I’ve lost count at this point.  If you have not read it I highly recommend as I believe it is the most important book ever written that puts habits in layman’s terms.  Most books on habit come across more psychological and medical that I simply cannot keep up.  Duhigg is not a psychologist, nor a doctor, but quite the contrary; he was a writer for the New York Times.  At any rate I recommend you read, but that’s not the point of this post.

My point is that I notice every year when the calendar switches from old year to new year, it takes me almost 2 weeks so stop writing the old year when signing dates and to go into auto mode in writing the new year.  It’s not as if I don’t know it’s 2018 versus 2017.   If anyone on the street stopped me and asked the year I would easily and quickly respond, “Oh, it’s 2018, why do you ask?”

My observation is how powerful habits are in our life.  Although I have the knowledge of the year being 2018, the power of my writing and typing habits is more powerful than said knowledge of knowing the year.  This happens to people when we move from an address we’ve lived at for many years.  It happens when we change zip codes.  I once answered the phone incorrectly at a job and identified myself as an employee of my former employer while standing in the building of my new employer.  Have you ever driven home, but for the life of you you cannot recall how in the world you got home?

The Power of Habit.

Danny’s World: Social Media & One of My Favorite Quotes

Danny's iphone 022Any time I scan Facebook I can’t help but think of a quote from Steven Furtick.  But first here’s what makes me think of the quote.

I see so many smiling faces.  Pictures of parties.  Posing. Smiling.  Family pics.  More smiling.  More posing. Everyone is doing it.  Vacations.  Exotic locations. Amusement parks.

Furtick said, “The reason we struggle with insecurity is we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.”  Boy, what a powerful statement and so true about modern day society.

I am curious to see the psychological effect social media has on kids over the next 20 years.  Constantly seeing everyone else’s highlight reel compared to your behind-the-scenes.  The impact could be devastating.

Message to my Ego

Aria-Bella Rises!

Aria-Bella Rises


I have realised I have been quite a meanie to my Ego. Blaming her for most bad things and whenever I have a human moment. I bag her in my blog and then expect her to treat me nicely, which let’s face it, would you be nice if blamed and shamed all the time?

My panic has been bad this week and it was only when Super J pointed out just how mean I have been to her that I realised Ego was putting on a show because of my hateful words.

So this is a blog to my Ego, a nice blog!

I want to take the time to Thank my Ego for being there all of my life. For protecting me from things she deemed unsafe and for putting me on the right path when I could have gone many other unsavoury ways. She has always been a…

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I Will Love Myself (Daily Word Prompt is Lovingly)

I want you to meet My Loud Bipolar Whispers!

My Loud Whispers of Hope

Throughout my life I have not liked myself but,

I will lovingly accept who I am.

Years ago I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and

I will lovingly accept my illness and who I have become.

My passion is to increase awareness, educate and reduce the stigma of bipolar disorder so,

I want to lovingly be the voice for many that cannot speak for themselves.

I will share my story and journey of living with bipolar disorder

openly, honestly and lovingly to let others know they are not alone.

I will stop talking about myself negatively and

will speak about myself positively and lovingly.

God made me uniquely beautiful and flawed but,

I will lovingly embrace myself and my life just the way it is.

“People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is…

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The Fox and the Grapes

fox-and-grapes-with-sigA Fox one day spied a beautiful bunch of ripe grapes hanging from a vine trained along the branches of a tree. The grapes seemed ready to burst with juice, and the Fox’s mouth watered as he gazed longingly at them.

The bunch hung from a high branch, and the Fox had to jump for it. The first time he jumped he missed it by a long way. So he walked off a short distance and took a running leap at it, only to fall short once more. Again and again he tried, but in vain.

Now he sat down and looked at the grapes in disgust.

“What a fool I am,” he said. “Here I am wearing myself out to get a bunch of sour grapes that are not worth gaping for.”

And off he walked very, very scornfully.

There are many who pretend to despise and belittle that which is beyond their reach.

**presented by The Library of Congress