Things are getting bad on the internet.

Tessa Can Do It! Positivity is Catching!

WordPress just shut my accounts down due to suspicious activity and forced me to create a new password.

Just recently my Amazon account was hijacked (email and password changed), after I got it back someone went in and closed it. I also had an account set up with my name and email in the UK.

I had to use a new email without my full name in it and change the password to something really weird, but someone still might be able to crack it. I created a new account. They were going to reopen my old one again, but what’s the point. Someone or more than one person has been busy on my accounts. Please be careful people. I would hate to have to create a new email and resign-up for everything. A lot of us use our names in our email addresses.

I also in the last year…

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3 questions to ask yourself if you raised kids in a dysfunctional home.

Lucky Otters Haven

Nobody’s perfect, and that goes for parents too.  There’s no such thing as a perfect parent. There’s something called a “good enough” parent though, which means that you are going to make mistakes raising your kids, no matter how much talent you have for the task or how well adjusted you are.  Children don’t come with instruction manuals, and some of the mistakes you make might even be pretty bad ones.    But overall, you’re “good enough” if your kids know you love them no matter what mistakes you made, and they turn out to be functioning, reasonably happy adults.

But for survivors of narcissistic abuse, things are a little more dire.   Because many of us suffer from mental disorders caused by abuse–C-PTSD, BPD, OCD, anxiety, depression, and a host of other mental maladies–we probably entered parenthood with less of a sense of ourselves and our place in the…

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The Chain Reaction Continues: Meghan Trainor Opens Up About Her Mental Health

Peace from Panic

It's the most confusing, frustrating thing ever

I love Meghan Trainor’s music. With empowering lyrics, her pop songs are upbeat, happy, and make me want to sing and dance. I’ve always pictured her that way too — bubbly, energetic, and confident. Maybe that’s why I was surprised when I heard her talk about her struggle with anxiety, panic attacks, and depression.

But hold on… why would that surprise me?

As a mental health advocate and someone who has recovered from panic disorder, I know darn well it doesn’t matter what the person looks like on the outside, he or she can still have problems on the inside.

People have said to me, “How can you possibly have anxiety when you’re so calm all the time? It doesn’t make sense.” I shrug and think, I don’t know. I can’t help it. 

That’s the thing. You never know.

I saw Meghan Trainor on NBC’s Today. She said the person…

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Meet and Greet: 7/6/18


It’s time for the Meet and Greet weekend everyone!!  Strap on your party shoes and join the fun!  

Ok so here are the rules:

  1. Leave a link to your page or post in the comments of this post.
  2. Reblog this post.  It helps you, it helps me, it helps everyone!
  3. Edit your reblog post and add tags.
  4. Feel free to leave your link multiple times!  It is okay to update your link for more exposure every day if you want.  It is up to you!

  5. Share this post on social media.  Many of my non-blogger friends love that I put the Meet n Greet on Facebook and Twitter because they find new blogs to follow.

What Is the Difference Between Judging and Being Judgmental?



What is the difference between judging and being judgmental?

There is a major difference between judging and being judgmental and I think it is important for more people to begin using their skill of judging.

Each day of our lives we are put in a position to which we must judge.  Webster’s Dictionary defines judging as: to form an opinion or conclude about or assess.  We meet new people and we must judge whether or not the person is safe; are they going to harm me?  We must judge people if for no other reason than to protect ourselves and our loved ones.

I have heard many people exclaim “judging is bad!”.  I completely disagree.  It is my belief that judging is necessary and is a skill which needs to be honed and developed.  If more people used their skill of judging they might find themselves involved in fewer bad situations.

“Don’t judge” is terrible advice and is a phrase that is so overused today that people begin to open themselves up to whatever or whomever happens down the trail.  The more appropriate phrase should be “Don’t be judgmental”.  Being judgmental infers a level of judging people from a moral standpoint or standing in a place of superiority while making said moral or critical disparagement.

It is being judgmental that we must avoid, not judging.  I like to think of judging as a way of comparing others to what we expect of good humans to keep ourselves safe and surrounded by those we can trust and those who will help us better ourselves.

Being judgmental is standing on one’s high horse while looking down on others while displaying overly-critical points-of-view or opinions.

For instance, I meet new people every day in my line of work.  On occasion I’ll meet a person and my sensors go off.  For some reason the person just doesn’t seem trustworthy.  I immediately think to myself to keep this person at arm’s length until I get a better feel for why my “don’t trust” alarms are ringing.   I am comparing them to my experiences in life and how I’ve learned people should act, respond and speak.  In this way judging is a form of discernment; a way for me to filter others and protect myself in the short-term until I get a better sense of the situation or person.

On the other hand, I meet the same person and they light up a cigarette.  As I’m standing there I just cannot believe this person would smoke and my internal conversation goes something like this…

“Don’t they know how bad smoking is for their body?  How intelligent could this person be to continue to smoke knowing they are killing themselves?  I’ll bet they are selfish too.  I wonder what his wife thinks about his smoking and his selfishness?  He probably smokes in his car with his kids.  Good grief what a terrible person this guy must be.”

We have all committed the act of being judgmental and all have had this kind of internal conversation about someone at some point.  Being judgmental is dangerous.  We put ourselves on the pedestal as the jury and look down on someone else while forming an overly-critical opinion.

As we live our lives I suggest we all hone the skill of discernment (judging) and reduce our inclination of being judgmental.

We must protect ourselves and keep our circles tight and secure.  But we shouldn’t allow our beliefs to create a mentality of superiority.  That’s how I see it.  Hope you have a great Thursday!


Thriving Tuesday Time


I am reading inspirational books and working on improving myself from within. Realization that one is so down there is a tremendous motivation to do better.

Want to share an inspirational story about a New York artist called Eric Sloane.He painted rural scenes like red barns, haystacks, milk houses with churns, churches, stone walls- all rural scenery. One of his favorite topics for his paintings was the sky. Throughout his life, he studied the colors of the sky, its changes, its clouds…

Image result for Eric Sloane paintingImage result for Eric Sloane paintingImage result for Eric Sloane painting

All pictures were taken from Google)

The words of his parting from this earth are described so beautifully in the book ” The Power of the Plus Factor” by Peale.

” Then there came the day when he laid down his palette and brushes and quietly went home to God leaving behind the beauty he created”.

One of the statements Eric often made and which is…

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The Beach Life Is the Life For Me


The beach life is the life for me…

A while back I wrote a post in which I stated I was leaning more toward becoming a mountain person versus a beach person.  I was wrong.

The long-standing issue has been my battle with heat and its impact on my MS symptoms.  In the last few months my symptoms have been nearly nonexistent (knock on wood) which reinvigorated my love for the shore.  Naples reminded me how much I love the ocean.

Evelina and I are headed to the beach house in Cherry Grove, S.C. weekend after next for a couple of relaxing days and I am excited like a kid at Christmas.  There is a small town north of the house called Southport that has a quaint fishing village feel with plenty of boutiques, restaurants and a ferry.  There’s also a town near the village where my dad grew up called Oak Island and I have so many great memories from my childhood.

Image result for southport ncWhen I was a kid we owned a Volkswagen Van and my family would visit Myrtle Beach for vacation.  We would always pitch tents at a campground which is the ultimate awesome adventure for a 10-year-old.  On our last day we would pack up and head to Oak Island for the day.  My dad would tell stories about the island most of which I pass on to Evelina every time we visit.  I love the place.

I am so happy to be able to enjoy the heat and the shore again.  At any rate, I hope everyone has a great Tuesday.  I am spending some time with work friends today and then headed back to Charlotte for the 4th celebration.


Confession in silence- An original poem-13 reasons why


Welcome back Guys and Gals to Manic Mondays 3 way prompt July 2 , 2018. It’s designed to fill the void of the WordPress daily prompt. I will be posting 3 prompts each monday. Pick 1, a combination or all 3! Feel free to use the photo in your entry post. Write a post using […]

via Manic Mondays 3 Way Prompt: Silence — All The Shoes I Wear

Thank you Laura for this wonderful opportunity. Here is a poem I wrote about Justin confessing to Jessica from 13 reasons why. And it is a combination of silence and confession from your 3 way prompt.

The person stood in front of me

Silent as could be

The guilt shinning through his eyes

Making my knees go weak

I searched his soul desperately

To find a hint of humor

To find that it was all a joke

But the only thing I…

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Be the change you want to see… – Over The Andes

  I saw this lovely quote and photo over on Nidhi’s page “Sunnies My Bunnies“.  Isn’t this a wonderful way to change how we have that conversation with our children?  We would probably be amazed by the answers they give us! Please head over to Nidhi’s site to read her thoughts on this quote. via […]

Source: Be the change you want to see… – Over The Andes


You used to enjoy WordPress’ Daily Post? Many bloggers offer a similar challenge since june 1st, and there really is no competition… But if you are looking for a daily dose of inspiration to keep your blogging mojo going, pay the Word of the Day Challenge a visit…

Word of the Day Challenge

Today’s word of the day is EMPHATICALLY

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