I Cry Today

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I divide my life into two distinct categories-my memories prior to 9/11 and life that existed after 9/11. I could not watch today without reliving the emotions of that day as I have every year since. As it is difficult to believe 15 years have passed it is even harder to believe there are college kids who only know of this day through the images that replay and the stories they’ve heard.

Life moves quickly. But for me time seems to stand still when I watch the images from that day. As if my emotions have been stored forever in a capsule that is opened each time I watch the events unfold. They are fresh just as they were that day. The pain is still real. The fear is still there. The overwhelming sadness still robs my soul of compassion.

I want to tell those jumpers that everything will be okay. But I know that is a lie. I’ll try to imagine the desperation they must have felt. The burning pain that must have existed to convince them the only solution was to jump. I want to catch them and hold them. But I cannot.

I cry today as I did 15 years ago.

I still battle the demons inside that wish death of those who perpetrated the attacks. I want them and everyone like them to suffer. But I also know this is not going to bring those who died back to life. So I cry this morning watching the replay as I have every single year since that day. I’ll think about how life is different now compared to then. I’ll thank God above for my wife and family. And then on Monday morning I will go to work and my life will start up once again. I guess that is how it is supposed to go. I guess this is how it is supposed to be.

Nous sommes tous les Parisiens

See-Clic-Pic shares photos of the Paris tribute.

see-clic-pic

Last night, Saturday November 14th, I went to Trafalgar Square.  I was still recovering from being ill but I could not stay in with such awful news.  I felt the need to document this event of commemoration, solidarity and fraternity.  It was moving, extraordinary and beautiful in its tragic sadness.

To have Trafalgar Square filled with French people seemed oddly apt, burying any age old enmity in a shared sense of outrage, grief and steadfast determination to stand against evil and terror.  Though the Square was filled with French people I met folks form all over the world who had gathered to stand together, from Australia, China, India, USA, Germany, Holland, Spain and closer to home Ireland and Scotland.  All united in a common purpose; to oppose tyranny, and show that they will stand with France in the coming days.  If we are to defat this utterly evil regime we…

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To Paris With Love.

A tribute to France.

Game, Complain, Repeat

wpid-img_20151115_235300.jpgOn Friday one of the worst atrocities inflicted by a terrorist organisation since the Madrid bombings occurred in Paris, resulting in multiple casualties and hundreds more wounded. I was deeply saddened and horrified by the callous hostility demonstrated by a terrorist group whose name won’t be published, as they deserve no further media recognition for their vile expressions. Any event of such magnitude would be cause for condolence and grievance, yet this heinous perpetration was only exacerbated by my girlfriends arrival in the capital earlier on that day. I wasn’t notified of the attack until late in the evening when I promptly attempted to contact my girlfriend. And for the briefest of moments, for half a heart beat I thought I’d lost her. Almost believing that she had gone to an ethereal realm where I could not follow. She is fine thankfully, returning today a little shaken and rather surprised…

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The City Of Love

A Momma’s View discusses the current situation in France.

A Momma's View

Over the last 48 hours the city of love, Paris, was turned into the city of pain and sorrow, uncertainty, maybe fear and terror. It feels like watching a Bond movie. But it’s terribly real. In times like this it’s difficult to grasp what has happened. I’m sure that there are many posts out there about this at the moment. Honestly, I did not check my Reader just yet. I want to keep my mind free of everyone else’s thoughts. This time I don’t need any inspiration from the outside.

What happened in Paris should make us think once more. We get forced into no longer feeling free or safe in our own country, we are forced into worrying when we go out. We are forced into fighting back, maybe officially starting a war, which then feeds the ones that want to hurt us.

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